“The Pink Panther 2” creeps into theaters today with all the surreptitiousness of a giant van that makes a dreadful noise, since the film is filled with dissipation and rather extreme moments that are far from being tasteful.

 

Steve Martin, who has returned as Inspector Jacques Clouseau, also serves as one of the movie’s writers, together with Scott Neustadter and Michael H. Weber. Maybe this is the reason why the wacky, good-for-nothing character appears in almost every scene of the film. However, one cannot possibly regret this move, because the entire sequel takes its force from Mr. Martin’s performance, who strives to make the most of every moment.

Unfortunately, he fails to do so or at least the story is too dull to let him bloom.

 

Actually, “The Pink Panther 2” is more of a long sequence of comedy skits brought together slightly chaotically in an attempt to pose as a movie. In addition, Steve Martin seems to have called on his friends and all the people whose company he enjoys, because the movie looks like a never-ending revelry. We sure hope the actors had a great time, because the “Panther” is not very fun for audiences and at least one party has to have the benefit of the bash, right?

 

The film displays no plot at all, because one can’t call a couple of on-tape games an outline, while the “comical” moments are intolerably overcooked.

 

When we meet Inspector Jacques Clouseau again, he has just been sent out to give off parking tickets around Paris by… Chief Inspector Dreyfuss (who else?), impersonated by John Cleese, who delivers an incredible performance that lacks flaws even throughout this thin plot, if we can call it this way.

 

In the meantime, a series of robberies takes place and an enigmatic thief going by the name of the Tornado has stolen the Magna Carta, the Shroud of Turin, an antique samurai sword, the pope’s ring and the sought-after Pink Panther diamond. Thus, a crew of investigators, including characters played by Alfred Molina and Andy Garcia, is amassed so as to recover the vanished objects.

 

Emily Mortimer returns as Clouseau’s assistant and girlfriend Nicole, while Jean Reno plays the Frenchman’s loyal helper Ponton. On his way to making us laugh, Clouseau climbs walls and chimneys, burns up clothes, breaks bottles and bumps into anything that gets in his way. Unfortunately, this extended race fails to put a single smile on one’s face. It is artificial and dull, marking Steve Martin’s first unfunny role.