Okay, this is more than far-fetched! It’s preposterous if you ask me. Rumor has it that Cher, yes…Cher, is in talks to impersonate Christopher Nolan’s Catwoman in the third Batman film by the British director.

Maybe the 62-year-old Oscar winner can turn back time in her songs, but it’s definitely too late for her to replace Michelle Pfeiffer or Halle Berry.

You’re probably wondering what kind of joke this is, but you’d better ask the Daily Telegraph staff, as they reported the mind-boggling news in a Sunday article. The Daily Telegraph cited an unnamed studio executive who supposedly said that Cher was the director’s first choice to play Catwoman, as he wished for the singer/actress “to portray her like a vamp in her twilight years.”

“The new Catwoman will be the absolute opposite of Michelle Pfeiffer and Halle Berry’s purring creations,” the alleged source added. You can say that again.

Any news would have been better than this. What’s next? Sean Connery to play Batman? His James Bond was incredible, but such roles would not fit him anymore. This is the case of Cher, too.

Anyway, we should take a deep breath and move on to the next rumor spread by the same once-upon-a-time trustworthy source. The Daily Telegraph also reported that Golden Globe winner Johnny Depp is on the next Batman movie cast list, right next to Cher. He will allegedly play the Riddler’s persona.

Take some time out, Daily Telegraph. You’re unquestionably hallucinating. “The Dark Knight” is still in theaters, there’s no script yet and you just made up an awesome cast list.

I think Batman’s having hysterics, shaking Gotham City with his rough and gruff laughs.